me vs. nyc

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Just back from that little, sleepy town called New York. Played a show at the Knitting Factory with Lo Fine. It was a great event. Our dear friends Lori and Matthew have their own poetry press called "Verse Press" and we were performing as part of a nationwide valentine's day party that they were having in celebration of their great new book/compilation CD. Read all about it here : www.versepress.org
The Malarkies (my favorite band), Mark Mulcahy and Jason from Songs;Ohia all played as well. I was really happy for Matthew and Lori, the night seemed to be a complete success.
That being said, I hate NY. Absolutely despise it. I appreciate the fact that it's a microcosm of the world. Every ethnicity living together, working together and eating together. That's great. Sadly, what I feel truly matters in NY is commerce. Plain and unadulterated capitalism at its most rampant (there are monsterous billboards on the Westside Highway that are TV screens playing commercials; that's safe). I don't see the romance, I see the speed. I don't see the kind and caring, I see the self-absorbed and frightened. I don't hear the sweet sounds of bebop or the fire of noise bands and artrock, I hear everything at once. Sirens and horns and cars and cell phoners. I never, ever feel comfortable. As soon as I leave my town for NYC I find myself thinking (sometimes within minutes of departure) of when I can return home.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not some scaredy cat. There are other cities that I love. Boston. Flagstaff. Phoenix. Portland, Maine. I hear Chicago is amazing. I can handle the intimidation of a place of that magnitude. I'd just rather not. Since I have that option, then why should I lie to myself and pretend that it's an important place to me? I won't do that. I hope you love the city, I just don't. Fuck NYC. Go Sox.